Bushed.

I have said that I am going to try and post something everyday. I am absolutely completely bushed, I can't think of one thing that is humorous, or coy or anything.

I had to give a presentation to a bunch of people today (about 50) and it was really taxing. My mind is cooked. My mother has this theory about what she calls a psychic vampire. These are people that through no fault or attempt on their part some how manage to suck your will to think or function like a human being. I was surrounded by them today.

I had come up with a basic script and agenda for what I wanted to talk about. The presentation (if you will) was divided up into 3 parts each about 15 minutes long with a 30 minute Q&A. I got finished with my portion in 20 minutes all in and these people knew that once the Q&A was over that we were going to let them all go. So what happened? These people asked about 7,000 questions. Some of them were asked three times. And if they didn't get the answer they wanted, they would ask it again, but with a different verb modifier.

Q1. Is it okay to lean against the rail if we are tired?
A1. No, leaning against the rail is not tolerated, it makes you lazy.
Q2. Is it okay to lean against the rail if we are very tired?
A1. Oh, well let me think, if you are very tired I suppose it is okay.

I had a point where I was reminded of this scene in "A FEW GOOD MEN" where Demi Moore objects to a line a questioning and when she is overruled, says, "YOUR HONOR! I STRENUOUSLY OBJECT." About five minutes later in the movie Tom Cruise really rips into her for being a bit daft. Anyway. I was really nervous about the presentation but it went fine (psychic vampires and all).

Since I am so sacked I will tell you another joke, since I have been hearing so many of them recently

This guy walks into a bar sits down at the bar and says to the bartender, "Bartender I need 5 shots of Jagermeister."

The Bartender pours the shots and sets them up on the bar. Where the guy proceeds to slam them all down, one after the other with barely any room to breath.

The Bartender says to the guy, "Hey, buddy, you are drinking those pretty fast what are you celebrating?"

To which the guy responds through the clinched teeth that only Jagr gives, "First blowjob."

The Bartender says, "Hey congratulations. Let me buy you one more."

The guy shakes his head and says, "No thanks, if 5 shots of Jagermeister won't get the taste out of my mouth... nothing will."

The good news is I just fucked your wife.